.” She said, wobbling slightly. “Is a crime and all. But anyway, this beast...” She pointed at me. “Was pounding away at my unmentionables. And that beast...” She pointed to my left. “Started sliding into my bum!” Her accent had been slipping from her somewhat middle class diction to something more akin to a dockside Tarantian slum. I shook my head slowly. Her finger wobbled, pointing at the phantom double that she was clearly seeing through her alcoholic haze.“Fine!” I said. “I’ll give you a sausage!”“Oh!” Virginia flopped forward. Her cheek mashed against the joining of my pants and she rubbed against my groin through the clothes. “Goodie.”“I have had too much to drink,” Gillian announced.“You know what that -hic- means?” Sally asked, leaning in close, whispering loudly enough in Gillian’s ear for all of us to hear.“No, I mean...” Gillian set her mason jar of vodka down, rubbing at her nose. “It’s ... because ... I am seeing things.” She looked out beyond the campfire, at the thick. Thenthe questions started in earnest. They both worried that they had got mygender wrong all this time from my birth, and started blaming the doctorand themselves for not paying enough attention to my genitals. I brokeout in a fit of giggles at the mental image that gave me, which firsthorrified them, and then calmed them down as they saw the absurdity ofthe situation. Vicki held my hand as we all laughed away thenervousness.Finally, I filled them in. "No, Mom, Dad, you had things right on thatrespect. I didn't find out this aspect of myself until later on. Let’sstart over again, ok? I go by Chloe these days, and I am a transgenderwoman. This lovely vision next to me is my Fianc?© Vicki, and we have alot to catch up on." I paused to wave at the Wait staff, who brought apre-arranged cheese tray over to our table as I waved my mom and dad tojoin us. I then filled them in on my post college adventure. I maybe puta bit more heat into my condemnation of their basic date arithmetic.
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